Why You’re Not Bad with Money—You Just Haven’t Found Your Rhythm Yet
When it comes to managing personal finances, many South African women feel stuck in a cycle of frustration and self-doubt. “I’m just bad with money,” you might think as you stare at another unexpected expense or feel overwhelmed by credit card debt. But here’s the truth: you’re not bad with money—you just haven’t found your financial rhythm yet.
Just like dancing to a new beat, managing money is a skill that takes time, practice, and the right guidance to master. Once you discover a rhythm that works for your unique circumstances, values, and goals, everything begins to flow more naturally.
Why You’re Not “Bad” with Money
It’s easy to internalise shame about money, especially in a society that bombards us with mixed messages: spend to keep up, save to succeed, and somehow balance it all effortlessly. But financial struggles don’t mean you’re bad with money. Often, they point to:
- Lack of Financial Literacy: Many of us weren’t taught how to manage money growing up, leaving us to navigate it through trial and error.
- Emotional Triggers: Money is deeply tied to emotions like fear, guilt, and even joy. If these emotions go unchecked, they can drive impulsive decisions.
- Unrealistic Expectations: Comparing yourself to others or striving for perfection can create the illusion that you’re failing when you’re simply human.
What you need isn’t judgment or self-criticism—it’s a rhythm that helps you take control of your financial story.
Finding Your Financial Rhythm
Your financial rhythm is the unique pattern of behaviours, decisions, and habits that align with your values and circumstances. Here’s how to find yours:
1. Understand Your Financial Personality
Just like everyone has a different learning style, we also have unique money personalities. Are you:
- A spender who values experiences or possessions?
- A saver who feels secure with a cushion in the bank?
- A giver who prioritises helping family or community?
- A dreamer who’s focused on long-term goals?
Knowing your natural tendencies can help you work with, rather than against, your instincts.
2. Get Clear on Your Why
Your rhythm begins with your purpose. Ask yourself:
- What does financial success look like to me?
- How do I want to feel about my money—empowered, peaceful, in control?
- What are my top three money priorities?
When your financial goals align with your deeper “why,” managing money feels less like a chore and more like an intentional act of self-care.
3. Build Habits, Not Perfection
Perfection is the enemy of progress. Instead of overhauling your entire financial life overnight, start small:
- Automate savings, even if it’s a modest amount.
- Create a budget that includes room for joy and flexibility.
- Set one financial goal at a time to build momentum.
Consistency—not perfection—is the key to lasting change.
4. Sync Your Money with Your Lifestyle
Your financial rhythm should support the life you want to live. For example:
- If you’re career-driven, consider investing in upskilling or creating a buffer fund to allow career transitions.
- If family is your priority, structure your finances to support school fees, family holidays, or a home.
- If giving is important to you, allocate a percentage of your budget to help others while still meeting your own needs.
5. Address Emotional Blocks
Money isn’t just about numbers—it’s deeply emotional. Recognise and address patterns like:
- Guilt spending: Buying things you don’t need to feel better in the moment.
- Avoidance: Ignoring bills or avoiding financial discussions out of fear.
- Scarcity mindset: Feeling there’s never enough, even when your needs are met.
Acknowledge these emotions and work to replace them with healthier beliefs about money.
6. Celebrate Small Wins
Every small step forward is worth celebrating. Paid off a credit card? Finished the month within your budget? Started an emergency fund? These victories are proof that you’re building your financial rhythm, one beat at a time.
You’re Not Alone in This Journey
Finding your financial rhythm is a process, not a one-time event. Be patient with yourself. Surround yourself with a supportive network, whether it’s a financial coach, a friend, or a community of like-minded women.
The Harmony of Financial Freedom
When you discover your financial rhythm, money stops feeling like a source of stress and starts becoming a tool for empowerment. You’ll find yourself making decisions with clarity, living with intention, and creating the life you’ve always envisioned.
Because the truth is, you were never bad with money—you just needed the right beat to dance to.
So, what’s the first step you’ll take today to find your rhythm? Start small, stay consistent, and trust that you have what it takes.
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Author
Samantha Sparkes
Prosperity Coach for Women
Samantha has a Masters degree in Industrial Psychology from Wits University and a Finance Coaching qualification from the University of the Free State. She is a prosperity coach for women entrepreneurs, guiding her clients towards financial confidence and strength.
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